You know eventually everyone has to learn a lesson the hard way. It's just the way we are built as human beings or at least in my opinion.
I have spent the last 20 years dreaming of being a filthy rich tycoon like you see in all the 90's MTV videos. Of course as I reach what should be the apex of my lifetime I'm only about %1 effective to that goal. Praise Jesus!
I'm not going to bore you to death with my trailer park history or multiple failed attempts throughout the years to become a successful entrepreneur but I do want to come clean and be totally honest about something.
My greatest strength is my ability to fuck a good thing up! I've always had good things in my life with great opportunities but it never seems to be quite good enough for my taste.
My grandfather used to say " You've got champagne taste on a beer budget!" I'm not entirely sure where that little saying of his came from but it is ringing loud and clear between my ears at this moment in his gruff northern voice.
I just cant be happy with what I have... it's like some crazy god damn disease! If everything was perfect in my life right now I doubt I wouldn't mess that shit up. Seriously. Doubt. It.
I'd love to say that I've learned a bit of patience but the truth is reality is a better teacher. I'm currently reeling with regret and pain from choices that I've made recently. As a matter of fact you could say that I have been shaken downright to the core of myself as a person.
I have had to question everything about myself and endure some gut wrenching pain. It's not the first time in my life that I've felt this caliber of pain but it's the first time it was totally self induced.
Love. Patience. Humility. Care. Empathy.
Those are the keys to not fucking a good thing up. Get to work!